No Babe.

I am very sad that my pregnancy did not develop further.

The doctor said there was no embryo. there was only a sac and there was no embryo inside.

So for now, my body will automatically discharge whatever little cells that were formed in the past few weeks.

I did not have exceptionally high expectations with this episode but it was surely heart-breaking. I read that it is fairly common and many women go on to have successful pregnancies later on. whatever it is, I just have to take the good, the bad, with a good attitude.

Nonetheless, everyone is encouraging. you know,, take care of your body now and try again, etc.

Ya, i know. ok. dont worry, i am accepting what i cannot control.

my cousin said that i should take heart to know that nature is like this, cells that are not so good to begin with will not develop.

ok, i will take heart to it.

so ladies & gentlemen, this is life.

Broke Back Stools

I wanted to title this entry as "love is in the air" but i thought it is too cheesy.

I love it when i could feel & see the "love" in the air.

the energy is dense enough for me to feel it literally.

i was at a BBQ dinner at a client's place. both my boss and i were invited.

when we got there, many people were already having second or third helpings and they were all relaxed and cool. the part i liked most was that i could feel the friendship they had for each other. you know, just plainly joking and chatting and making each other at home with food and drinks. i dont know why but i could feel that these people truly liked each other.

the whole relation was a business one, our client invited a few vendors for BBQ.

but it was more of a friendly gathering rather than a corporate one.

for i learnt, these people has known each other for over 30 yrs, mostly over 10 yrs.

i am among the new-kid-on-the-block and i belong with just a handful of new buyers who are also new at their jobs. so in a way, there is the 3rd generation, which is us.

it was all nice and i really liked it.

my HQ office CEO cooked a few dishes and brought to the party.

that includes the delicious chilli crab, which she explained to us the lengthy procedure of making the paste. i said we only know to eat. haha.

not forgetting her ever famous fish ball soup and the curry chicken that i didnt taste.

i guess any dish made with love is really impactful. simple but impressionable.

no wonder there's a saying "to win a man's heart is through his stomach" (appetite)

i always tell my husband, when we move to a bigger flat, i am going to cook and bake.

i wish for the day to come.

i was too excited to really eat. i only had bee hoon, one piece of crab and one stick of lamp.

excited because i was too conscious! all eyes was on me and some of the people joked that they thought i was my boss' phillipino girlfriend. (he is known to have many girlfriends and only likes phillipinos)

so anyway, i was a LOUSY conversationalist, if i ever did talk at all.

i sat beside a few people and we kept quiet the whole time.

i am terrible!

i am a bimbo!

terrible. all i did was to answer politely and nothing else. smile a bit. terrible.

there was this lady, she is the hairdresser of my CEO and she always joins the parties.

she is so bubbly and cheerful, joked and laughed a lot. heartily.

i wished i could be lighthearted too.

i bought a book that says "92 ways to make small talks" and i have not gone through 10pages.

terrible.

painfully shy.

"how could it be?" you think

i don't know.

oh, ok, broke-back stools.

you see those red stools in the picture above?

five people fell off their bumps and landed on the floor.

five or more almost did.

we joked that those were not "toyogo" brand, hence not hardy.

it was a night of laughter, though i thought it is not funny really, to fall off the seat. it could be dangerous.

so anyway, i learnt that beyond the surface of business and work,

what made the business successful is the friendship-engine that generates helpfulness, co-operation, loyalty and love that keep the business going fine.

i am glad and honoured to be in the circle and i sure think i've earned it!

=)

The Profundity I Observed From Sudoku

i know the craze has fizzled out for most who were once hooked on Sudoku and i have only just begun.

i thought the "beginner" level was easy, boy was i wrong!

i gave up on the second puzzle and skipped to the third.

but i realised that i will get nowhere if i continue with my strategy which was not useful.

so i read the tips given in front.

i saw the tips the first instance, but i thought i could do it on my own since there is no rule with this game.

nonetheless, the tips helpped a lot. the one point i have learnt which was most useful is that "there is no need to guess". that means each time you pencil your answer into the cube, it should be a "sure" answer. you can always derive the sure answer by scanning, logic, elimination & deduction. if the answer has not been clear, move to other cubes and come back to it later.

sometimes, the simpliest pointer could be the one that makes the whole difference.

i think this strategy is profound.

sometimes, we attempt too many things at one time, and the more "uncertain" things we put into our lives, the more we are doom for error. it could get so confusing that you have to back-track to undo some actions or change them. you will soon realise that one back-track change must lead to another as the whole picture is interlinked.

on the other hand, if you had put in a "sure" action, meaning, you are firm with your decision and you will live with it, the less back-tracking you have to do.

of course there will be times you may make a wrong decision, give a wrong answer due to wrong assessment and deduced wrongly because of lack of information or lack of check-points,, it is fine. it is just an experience. your life is an experience.

weekend at Hat Yai

Hat Yai to me, feels like Malaysia,, the buildings, streets and shopping malls are similar.
Prices are relatively cheaper.
S$100 = Thai Baht $2,270
T-shirts on the street cost $100-200baht (S$4.40 to $8.80)
good quality T-shirts at shopping malls cost around S$12.70
Seafood meal / sharks fin / crab / etc S$70 for 4 pax

I had spent only $500 on shopping.
but i always feel that i end up with very little things.

Perhaps it's because 70% of the things i buy are for others.
i will always want to buy for my cousins, my sis and my freind's children.

This time, i make a point to buy more stuff for myself.

example:
i bought 6 boxes of disney biscuits and intend to keep 3.
2 bottles of wrigley's chewing gum, 1 for myself, the other,, either my sis or val.
loomp-chiam-pass, see who gets it. (i think whoever comes to my place earlier will get it)

so anyway, here are some presents:-

I had McDonald's happy meal to get this hello-kitty toy for cousin hong jing,
bought an addidas a football jersey for bing lun & lip gloss kit for zhi ting.

Bought a furry-beady pair of slippers for myself,
2 dainty looking purses for myself and sis.
i like the design BUT there is an "anna sui" plate on it,,,, i am not gonna carry it!
i always say, don't use counterfeit stuff, don't!
the thing is,,, there isn't such a design or purse from anna sui!
so, i really dont know what is happening. i should get a nice brooch to pin over the tag.

Bra, glorious bra. my colleagues insisted i buy the maternity bras which they claim is "dirt cheap" and is selling like 5 times more back home.
anyway, i bought a few new bras cos the ones i have are getting small!

bought Enfant panties for joo joo
some sports bra for charmaine
2 mickey tog bags for chrystal & marilyn each
some T-shirts for my colleagues
and! shampoo for myself
not forgetting numerous body butter, face mask & body wash.

Hat Yai (pictures)

Hat Yai (1)

Hat Yai (2)